New Year is full of high expectations and resolutions to 'change'. Maybe that's not what we should be focusing on, because lets be honest, they rarely ever work do they? Instead we just feel miserable for failing and at the same time we have negated the whole previous year by making a resolution at all and implying that whatever we did in 2012 wasn't good enough.
Why do we do this to ourselves? Why not just celebrate what we have achieved?
Personally, I am proud of how far I've come in 2012.
I worked hard and come so far in recovery; from depression, self harm, binge-eating and a suicide attempt.
I don't hate myself anymore, and I do my best to treat myself with the same respect that I would give to anyone else.
Things I am proud of myself for:
Cutting only once in seven months.
Being truly honest with a therapist for the first time.
Doing things that I am scared of.
Talking about how I feel, what I think, not only to my Mental Health Adviser, but also to friends.
Getting through my first year at uni, and working hard in my second year.
Getting a first in my practical report.
Doing the hard thing because it is good for me rather than taking the easy route.
Mental Health Campaigning with my student's union and joining the university's mental health advisory board as a student rep.
Not hiding my illness anymore.
Moving into a house with my friends, making it into home.
Connecting with others who suffer/have suffered, through YouTube and various university outlets (e.g. the society for disability awareness)
Making new friends and keeping in touch and staying close with old friends. Getting closer to some friends and sharing more of myself with them.
Clawing my way back to health and happiness, even when I didn't believe it was there.
Treating my illness seriously and doing everything I can to keep it at bay.
Looking after myself emotionally and physically and keeping my surroundings positive.
Ignoring the lies my illness tells me. Telling myself the truth.
Connecting with others at university through getting involved e.g. through societies.
Getting up in the morning and carrying on with the day, even when I really don't want to.
Appreciating my friends. Appreciating my family.
Acknowledging my pain, but not holding onto it.
Facing things that are hard. Talking about them, which can be even harder.
Letting my feelings out in a healthy way, rather than bottling them up and hurting myself.
Letting the past go.
Having hope for the future.
Fighting.
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